I lay quietly on my bed. On my back horizontally with my legs dangling off the side. My arms lay straight over my head, my eyes were closed. Another day finished. Two kids asleep. Bathed. Fed. Taken care of. No injuries. No major catastrophes. Just a few dirty looks. Five year old attitude. Two year old tears. But no worse the wear. I lay in silence. Needing some Time. Time for me.
I heard his footsteps approach behind me. He brushed my hair off my forehead, around my ears from above me. I jumped a little as he proceeded to push his iPod ear buds into my ears.
“Just listen”, he said as I looked up above me, questioning his motives.
The music started beating in my ears. I smiled as I recognized the song from the concert we had enjoyed the night before. Outside in the summer air. Moving together to the familiar, as well as the new music that would become some of our favorites.
It filled not only my ears, but my head and mind. My overflowing, often overwhelmed, usually overthinking mind. The music pushed all That aside. Made me forget the lists, the plans, the routines, even for just a few moments.
I swayed my head back and forth to the rhythm. Tapped my hands beside me. Let my feet wave from side to side. I mouthed the words. Maybe sang them aloud too. Lost. Immersed in song. No interruptions. No one expecting anything from me. And if they did, I couldn’t hear them.
There are so few things that can bring me to That place. The one where I’m allowed to not Think. Not Able to think. About anything that needs thought. Music in my ears can block out everything surrounding me. As well as everything inside of me. Especially when the words hold meaning that make me want to scream them at the top of my lungs.
Four minutes and seventeen seconds of Joy. Even though the music was loud, in comparison to the norm inside my head it felt quiet. Peaceful. Perfect.
It’s one of my favorite things Tim does. Plays DJ for me as I lay on the couch, on the beach, in bed. He puts those buds in my ears and plays to my mood. Songs I crave. Songs I have never heard but when they end I want to repeat. Repeat. Repeat. He watches for one song to end. So he can push play on his next planned song.
I usually have my eyes closed. So I’m not sure if he’s watching my reaction to each song as it starts. But if he is, he’ll see my smile as I recall the first time I heard the tune. Or the emotion spread across my face as I fall in love with the new lyrics I’m hearing for the very first time. And he’ll hear me humming those songs for the rest of the day, even if I don’t realize that I am.
Simple. Pure. Joy.
Joy to me is just that. It’s simple. Easily attained. Can be found almost anywhere. Like a song. Doesn’t require much explanation. Can be fleeting or last a lifetime. You don’t have to fear admitting joy. Like you may when you admit love or adoration or passion. Joy comes in small packages from honest, sweet places and it can spread. Because everyone craves a bit of joy. And will grab onto it when they can.
Even if it only lasts four minutes and seventeen seconds.
Give me the beat boy to free my soul
I want to get lost in your rock and roll
And Drift Away…
*The song that inspired this post was Drift Away by Uncle Kracker with Dobie Gray.