I am so honored to have my friend Kristen from Motherese visiting my little “home” today as part of Never True Tales Won’t You Be My Neighbor. It’s good timing for her visit because I’ve been a bit under the weather (as you know if you read any of my past like 27 posts) and could use a distraction from the cabin fever I’ve been facing. Luckily I have an abundance of Purel scattered about.
I met Motherese back in November and haven’t missed a post since. It’s usually the first blog I read in the morning and she leaves me pondering her words throughout the day. Many of you know I’m a big “wonderer”. I wonder about the small, insignificant things and the big, life altering things. I write often of these little curiosities that overtake my head and it’s as if Kristen is also inside my head because the things she writes about, so often are what I’m wondering. She just articulates them so much better than I ever could. Her words are captivating and honest. Her thoughts poignant. I have absolutely LOVED getting to know her over the past few months and I know you will too.
Milestone = Mild Groan
Yesterday morning I received an e-mail from BabyCenter announcing, “Your baby is 6 months old! He is now rolling over in both directions!”
Oh, he is, is he?
Like Big Boy before him, (Not-Really-So) Tiny Baby is off the charts in terms of height and weight (and sheer cuteness, naturally), but is lagging a bit on some of those pesky developmental milestones.
When Big Boy was younger, I would graze on those child development checklists (like the ones in this book, and in this one) the way Big Boy now eats his vegetables – reluctantly, but with a vague sense that it’s “what one does.” Reluctantly because he didn’t always measure up. He hit all of the cognitive and social benchmarks, but weeks or months would pass between the standard for movement milestones and when he actually achieved them. He rolled late, he crawled late, he walked late.
And mostly that was okay with me. After all, none of those lists quantified the moments whose qualities I cared about – the first time he nuzzled into my neck, the first time he held onto me when I was holding him, the first time he reached out his arms to me. But those pesky creatures known as Other Moms sometimes got – and get – to me. Big Boy was perfect in my eyes, but I thought to protect him best I needed to start seeing him through the eyes of others as well.
Big Boy did not crawl until he was almost a year old. When we visited our pediatrician for a well-check, hearing the questioning tone of my peers like an alarm in my head, I asked the doctor – a soft-spoken, no-nonsense gentleman – if this was cause for concern. His typically laconic response:
“Put things he wants near him, but just out of reach. He will move toward them when he’s ready.”
And, of course, he did. Moved toward them and away from infancy, away from complete dependence, and toward a life of milestones that likely, maybe even hopefully, will not be in step with anyone else’s checklist.
What was the biggest milestone in your life? What was the most memorable of your child(ren)’s milestones?