My blog saw the demise of its first post today. Where this post now sits, sat another earlier today. It sat alive for most of the day and the words I wrote received such wonderful comments. But unanimously the thoughts from the friends who spent the time commenting said I “was brave”. And the fact that everyone thought I was so brave, made me second guess my words, made me fear hurting people who may read them. So I deleted them all.
On the one hand I’m sad because I think my words were worth writing and it may have helped to have even more people read them and tell me their perspectives. But, I do think I made the right decision. I did what felt right to me.
It does beg the question as to where I draw the line in what I write in this blog. I’ll have to do some soul searching on this. For now, those words I wrote this morning, will instead be spoken. I’ll be better off saying them to the few who deserve hearing them, instead of publishing them for all to see.
My day started on a difficult note, with a raging headache and so many words swimming inside my head. My day is ending with my little girl’s hand in mine. With her head on my shoulder, snuggled under a blanket. No words. Sometimes, I’m better off with no words.