Nature vs. Nurture


I am fascinated. Truly. Fascinated. I watch Hannah and Luke and laugh that ANYONE can debate “nature vs nurture”. I cannot believe how amazing it is to see how all boy Luke is and how all girl Hannah is. I did not force it. I did not even suggest it. It. Just. Happened. Here is my LIST of examples:

– From only a few months old Luke has been obsessed with balls. Not as much his OWN balls although I do bring this up later in my list) but other, round, spherical shaped things of all sizes. Most minutes of the day he is carrying AT LEAST two around with him. The only time you’ll see him with one is if it’s a beach ball or other larger ball that needs both hands to carry. I am convinced this is why Luke “scooted” instead of crawled normally. Crawling would not have allowed for the carrying of his balls. And now that he’s walking he is able to carry two balls as well as kick a ball all at once. Now, I’m not saying that girls don’t like balls and are less apt to end up playing with balls (please keep your mind out of the gutter… you know what kind of balls I’m referring to here). But, for the most part, boys like balls and my son is no exception.
– From a very young age Hannah has taken care of “things”. I say “things” because her range of what she cared for was far and wide. She did (does) have her dozen or so baby dolls that she dotes on, but she has been known to care for other inanimate objects as well. For example, I recall the day we bought her her first soccer ball and soccer goal. I was so excited to get her into this sport that I think is so fantastic to start as a young age. We brought her outside with her new (pink) ball and she kicked it maybe twice, no, make that once and then I watched her place the ball in the goal, run inside to get a blanket, a book and a bottle and then so sweetly put the ball to bed. She even sang it a lullaby. Tim put his arm around me while watching this unfold, shook his head and said, “There’s our daughter. The athlete.”. She is THE most caring wannabe doctor 4 year old you’ll ever meet. And she did not get this from me. I mean I am a caring mother, don’t get me wrong, but I have been pushing sports on her pretty much from the start. And I was NOT a baby loving little girl. I used to drag my baby dolls around by their hair and leave them disheveled, unfed and uncared for much to MY mom’s dismay.
– I DID NOT teach Luke to push trucks around making the brrrrmmmmmm sound. He just did it one day. I walked into the family room and there he was, scooting along, pushing the one truck that we happened to have in the house around making this motor sound. I just watched. Amazed.
– Luke has discovered his penis. And now it seem to have a magnet in it that draws his hand to it every time his diaper is removed. And so it begins…
– I think Luke might be part owl considering how far he is able to twist his head around when he sees a fire truck or other large truck drive by. This is not something Hannah found remotely interesting when she was tiny or even now. It’s a boy thing. Big. Noisy. Truck= entertainment for a small boy. He makes a truck sound and claps his hands when one is in sight and doesn’t like when he still hears it but can’t see it which is when the owl thing comes into play.
– I did try to steer Hannah clear of Princess Overload but seeing as she’s All Girl, it was an impossible attempt. I did enjoy the story of Cinderella when I was little (and I do recall having my parents read me the book at least 7 times a night) but never did I dress up like her, tell people I was her, fight with my friends over who could pretend to be her or have a birthday party in honor of her. I did not teach Hannah to love princesses. I actually wanted to stay far away from buying all of the princess decor, but I, as Mother of the All Girl, folded and now share my home with Belle, Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty and Ariel in too many rooms. I may be reinforcing it, but I did not teach it.
– Anything that Luke can hold and smash on something while shouting “Bap Bap Bap” makes him happy. I don’t recall Hannah taking such joy out of smashing one thing into another. She was happier sitting quietly with a book and a baby or removing “guck” from wherever she was sitting. I didn’t preach demolition to Luke, nor did I try to get Hannah to be such a neat freak… again, it just happened.
All of this makes me wish I could go back to school and study early childhood development. Because, as I said, I. Am. Fascinated. I could watch the two of them all day, in awe of their differences. It will be interesting as Luke grows up to see how he reacts to Hannah forcing her baby dolls on him, dressing him up in princess get-ups, and accessorizing him with jewelry. He does love pushing around a stroller, brushing his own hair, smooching and hugging her babies and dancing to Fergie, but I think the time for all that will end when he sees he has a CHOICE to NOT do these things. And that day will make me a little sad.
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1 Comment

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One response to “Nature vs. Nurture

  1. Liz

    I actually DID study Early Childhood and am STILL fascinated by how "rough and tumble" my boys naturally are. So save your time…if you go back to school go back for some other reason! =)

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